March 16, 2003
by Micah Issitt
Dear Micah,
My girlfriend saw some show on HBO the other night where they were talking about some kind of spiritual sex techniques. I went and bought a book about kinky sex and I tried some of it on my girlfriend but it didn't work out. What is the best way to learn about that spiritual sex stuff?
Ken Masters,
Kirkwood MO.
Thank you for writing to us, Ken. You've brought up a very good question. The world of spiritual or "tantric" sex can seem very intimidating at times. I will try to provide you with a few helpful hints that don't involve the sacrifice of a goat or any Latin chanting.
Tantric sex is the process of manipulating the many pressure points of the body to bring about a state of erotic ecstasy.
First, I must advise that the atmosphere for this type of lovemaking is at least as important as the lover's technique. Tastes may vary, but I strongly warn against eating a raw onion or playing AC/DC during foreplay. I believe that AC/DC reduces the sex drive in 99.8 percent of females.
In tantric practice, the female genitals are referred to as the "yoni" and the male genitals are referred to as the "lingam." For those of you more comfortable with the language of the streets, this translates into the "coochie" and the "dilsnick."
Believe it or not, the tip of the nose is a node on a very important cycle of sexual energy. Another little-known sensual spot is the frenulum. This is the small piece of connective tissue that connects the upper gums to the upper lip. If you gently suck your lover's upper lip, your lower lip will rub against her frenulum.
The hands and arms are shamefully ignored during foreplay. There is a crease in the wrist just between the bones of the hand and the bones of the wrist that has soothing and arousing potential. The fingers should be gently pressed into this area and manipulated in a circular motion. This relieves sexual tension and prepares the body for more intense "action". This works better and better as you and your partner become more intoxicated, so, if possible try to have a nice bottle of wine on hand.
The final point I will mention is found between the first two toes, just above the webbing where the bones join. If you massage this area on both feet in alternating fashion, it will send a strong pulse of relaxing energy throughout the body, culminating at the internal roots of the genitalia.
Here I have mentioned only a few techniques and a few erogenous areas, but lovers should remember that the entire body has erotic potential. Talk to your lover and attempt to create an atmosphere of comfort and open dialogue in order to discover what works best for you and your partner.
If you have followed my advice and your girlfriend does not seem to be satisfied, you may want to try a different approach. Try surprising your girlfriend by having sex with other women at her apartment/house. If this doesn't work you may have to face the possibility that your girlfriend might be a lesbian.
Hopefully I have answered your questions and put you down the road to spiritual satisfaction and sexual superiority. To all my readers, I wish you all success in luck and love.
Have a question for Micah? Submit it through the Motel Contact Form!